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Nigerian career coach exposes society’s hypocrisy toward effeminate men

An insightful commentary by a Nigerian coach has cast a spotlight on the inherent hypocrisy within Nigerian culture when it comes to embracing traits traditionally associated with femininity in men.

By NoStringsNG Contributor

Nigerian career coach Olabode Ifeanyi has sparked a debate on how Nigerian culture treats men who embrace traditionally feminine traits.

The catalyst for this discussion was a post on X by renowned Nollywood actor Editi Effiong in which he had shared a birthday tribute to Ezra Olubi, the Co-founder and Chief Technology Officer of Paystack, featuring a video of the actor dancing with the tech expert.

First let me start by saying I love Ezra so much .That being said , it is unfair how Nigerians treat effeminate men WITHOUT MONEY. If fem boys are treated with half the respect Ezra gets, they wouldn’t amount to 19.3% of overall suicide rate. We need to show love to people… https://t.co/FoSOIlJwJK — OLABODE Ifeanyi (@olabode_ifeanyi) November 12, 2023

Olabode Ifeanyi’s tweet about how Nigerians treat effeminate men differently if they are wealthy. (See original on X)

Known for his effeminate demeanor and advocacy for LGBTIQ+ rights, Olubi has faced criticism and trolling for deviating from societal gender norms.

Ifeanyi reshared the post and expressed his affection for Ezra, but he posited that the public’s admiration for the tech expert was primarily tied to his wealth and fame.

He contended that if society extended the same love and respect to all effeminate men, regardless of their financial status, the alarming suicide rates among this demographic would likely decline. This perspective implies a societal tendency to embrace anything or anyone associated with wealth.

Nigerian career coach Olabode Ifeanyi

Nigerian career coach Olabode Ifeanyi

This phenomenon isn’t confined to Nigeria; it echoes in various societies, even those with stringent anti-LGBT laws. Notably, many Nigerian celebrities, despite expressing homophobia domestically, have collaborated with rich, openly gay celebrities abroad. This underscores the influence of affluence in shaping societal acceptance.

The public reception of rich trans people, cross-dressers, and effeminate celebrities such as Bobrisky, Ezra Olubi, Enioluwa Adeoluwa, Denrele Edun, and Michael Uba further illustrates this point. These people have amassed substantial followings on social media and secured numerous endorsement deals from both local and international entities.

Internet celebrity Idris Okuneye, the Nigerian trans woman known online as Bobrisky

Internet celebrity Idris Okuneye, the Nigerian trans woman known online as Bobrisky

Conversely, the scenario is bleak for economically disadvantaged effeminate men and gender-diverse individuals who endure discrimination and violence in Nigeria. The prevailing perception in Nigeria and many parts of the world associates effeminacy with homosexuality, perpetuating discrimination. It’s crucial to recognize that not all effeminate men are gay, and effeminacy does not diminish an individual’s worth or make them less authentic, nor does homosexuality.

While it might seem that wealthy and famous feminine and gay individuals enjoy a secure and comfortable life, this assumption is misleading. Wealth and fame offer only a temporary and superficial solution. The stark reality persists: true freedom remains elusive until everyone enjoys it without exception.

Source: African Human Rights Media Network member NoStringsNG.